is that some bad hat for the giant gnome?
,Our friend Lee came barreling down the driveway recently with this in the back of
the F-150:
“Beautiful, isn’t it?”, he exclaimed. “Outstanding,” I replied, “What is it?” My first
thought was that it was an ill-designed hat for the giant gnome. But then I remem-
bered that the giant gnome already sports an ill-designed hat.
Lee set me straight. “It’s the roof of the new chicken coop.” He, Jude and I are going
into the poultry business. We’ll be raising chickens for eggs and meat. I’ll be the
primary caregiver, Jude will provide comprehensive medical attention, and Lee
will help the meat birds reach their full potential. I’m not sure if I can help him do
that, given my war experiences.
Mind you, I love chicken deep-fried, stir-fried, broiled, baked, grilled, braised,
rubbed, stuffed, crusted, crock-potted and nuggeted — but I cringe at the thought
of how they get to my home. I wish that was my most hypocritical behaviour.
Anyway, Lee is a man of many skills. He already knows a lot about our feathered
friends. He was tearing down a huge outdoor parrot cage and salvaged the top of it.
That not only keeps it out of the landfill, it reuses materials and helps our budget.
I might be able to help with the plucking, though. Remember our friend and drive-
way plower Jay? He told me about a machine that pulls feathers whiz bang. Check
it out here. I love it. It’s low tech and appeals to both my sense of pragmatism and
absurdity. It’s as silly looking as the roof of our new coop. I bet Jay or Lee could
make one.
